Ka-ching! It's Bing
Put on your extra-strength sunglasses, people, or be blinded by the radiance of Australia's shiniest superstar
Andrew Hughes
15-May-2009
Aka
Bing, or if you're feeling particularly adventurous, Binga.
Bing, or if you're feeling particularly adventurous, Binga.
As in Bing Crosby?
Er… not exactly.
Er… not exactly.
As in the noise a microwave makes?
No, much duller than that. He is named after a popular chain of electronics stores in the Sydney area. Told you.
No, much duller than that. He is named after a popular chain of electronics stores in the Sydney area. Told you.
What it says on his passport
Tall. Blond. Australian. Check his guitar case.
Tall. Blond. Australian. Check his guitar case.
Celebrity endorsements
Has a very selective approach and will not merely endorse any old product. To date, he has only put his name to breakfast cereals, eyewear, energy drinks, watches, shoes, cars, computer games and underpants.
Has a very selective approach and will not merely endorse any old product. To date, he has only put his name to breakfast cereals, eyewear, energy drinks, watches, shoes, cars, computer games and underpants.
How your grandmother would describe him
A nice young man with a lovely smile.
A nice young man with a lovely smile.
How white are his teeth?
Officially the whitest substance known to man, one of the main reasons he smiles so much is in order to dazzle opposition batsmen with the glare.
Officially the whitest substance known to man, one of the main reasons he smiles so much is in order to dazzle opposition batsmen with the glare.
Good karma
Lee is such an all-round good egg that even though he is one of the wealthiest sportsmen in Australia, he still works selling and fitting suits for the menswear shop that gave him a job when he was 17. He once even started a shift there just 10 hours after stepping off a flight from a Test series in South Africa.
Lee is such an all-round good egg that even though he is one of the wealthiest sportsmen in Australia, he still works selling and fitting suits for the menswear shop that gave him a job when he was 17. He once even started a shift there just 10 hours after stepping off a flight from a Test series in South Africa.
Bad karma
Despite the fact that the world's supply of mediocre singer-songwriters is already large enough to last until the next ice age, he is determined to bolster their numbers. An unrepentant guitar botherer, his band Six and Out have been trying the patience of the citizens of New South Wales for years.
Despite the fact that the world's supply of mediocre singer-songwriters is already large enough to last until the next ice age, he is determined to bolster their numbers. An unrepentant guitar botherer, his band Six and Out have been trying the patience of the citizens of New South Wales for years.
Keep him away from
Recording studios.
Recording studios.
Not quite as quick as
Shoaib Akhtar.
Shoaib Akhtar.
Quicker than
Everyone else.
Everyone else.
Annoyed grumpy Steve Waugh because
Lee knows the first names of all the opposition players and on occasions shakes their hands.
Lee knows the first names of all the opposition players and on occasions shakes their hands.
Annoys grumpy Yuvraj Singh because
Since his injury, Lee gets to sit with Preity Zinta when the Kings XI Punjab are playing.
Since his injury, Lee gets to sit with Preity Zinta when the Kings XI Punjab are playing.
What do his songs sound like?
The gurgling noise that lasts for a minute or two as the last dregs of water are swirling around the plughole.
The gurgling noise that lasts for a minute or two as the last dregs of water are swirling around the plughole.
Useful skill if shipwrecked
Could probably run you up a nice single-breasted double-vented three button suit out of palm leaves and seaweed.
Could probably run you up a nice single-breasted double-vented three button suit out of palm leaves and seaweed.
Most popular with
Housewives, dentists, orthopaedic surgeons.
Housewives, dentists, orthopaedic surgeons.
Least popular with
Tailenders, music lovers.
Tailenders, music lovers.
What he will be remembered for
Against New Zealand in 2005, he pioneered the use of baseball-style pitches, including the Twisting Temple-Tickler, the Curving Cheek-Chaser and the almost unplayable Vertical Nose-Flattener.
Against New Zealand in 2005, he pioneered the use of baseball-style pitches, including the Twisting Temple-Tickler, the Curving Cheek-Chaser and the almost unplayable Vertical Nose-Flattener.
Most likely to be overheard on the field of play saying
"Sorry mate, she slipped."
"Sorry mate, she slipped."
Chances of outstaying his welcome
He is planning a Bollywood career, is learning Hindi, and has been invited to sing the theme song for the 2011 World Cup. So quite high.
He is planning a Bollywood career, is learning Hindi, and has been invited to sing the theme song for the 2011 World Cup. So quite high.
Andrew Hughes is a writer currently based in England